Divorce is a very hard situation and nobody should get through it alone. Where do you get divorce guide? You know that thing that you found shocking? The line your spouse crossed? That act of betrayal that you and everyone you know is shocked and appalled by? The court doesn’t care. Short of provable acts of abuse or addiction they don’t give a shit. Ultimately, the court is there to divvy up property not mete out vengeance. You’re never going to have that Perry Mason moment where your ex gets on the stand and has to admit to his or her douchebaggery. They just want to figure out who’s getting the couch and where the kids go on Christmas.
If you have debt in your name, like credit cards or student loans, you will want to pay those debts down as much as possible before a divorce. Most American families spend close to their entire income, if not more, and when one household becomes two, there is often not enough money to pay the both sets of expenses unless something changes. You may have to cut down disposable purchases, sell your car and get a less expensive model, or maybe sell the house. If your spouse does not voluntarily support you and the children, your remedy is to ask the Court to order support. You will not have a good prediction of any of this and you will not know the answers for sure until the agreement is signed or the judge makes a ruling. But, the point is to think about it and identify problems and possible solutions. Then take the actions that you can take and avoid missteps.
Allow time to fully heal and reconnect with yourself before entering another relationship of any kind. The process of divorce is emotionally grueling. There is a lot to sift through and heal from. This is not the time to look to soothe oneself by entering another relationship. People make this mistake all the time. I personally went into a rebound relationship with someone who was sadder than I (like truly attracts like). It devastated me when it ended because I sought happiness and fulfillment outside of myself. This only leads to the same pattern to happen again. Learning this hard lesson pushed me forward and transformed me. I have a totally different mindset toward unconditional love and relationships now and I share this with my clients all the time.
This is a very bad idea for two reasons. First, except in extremely egregious cases, most courts won’t punish your spouse financially for being a bad person. Second, hiring an attorney to punish your spouse will cost you because your attorney will need to increase the number of hours spent on your case. Increased attorney hours means higher divorce costs, and higher divorce costs means there will be fewer assets and cash left for you and your family. Try to take the emotion out of your divorce, and treat your case as a business arrangement. The best revenge is to live well after the divorce is over.
Letting go of our unwanted items bought for our one-time dreams can bring joy and happiness to the next owner of the item, while providing them with high quality wedding items and other items at a fraction of the cost! Our very wise brides and grooms understand that diamonds are millions of years old and the vast majority are already recycled through jewelers and pawn shops, they understand that a 10K dress worn for a few hours can be purchased at 50% or more less than retail. Not only selling but buying too makes sense for everyone. Read more details on Divorce community.